Friday, May 6, 2016

CREATURES FROM THE ABYSS / Production Film 82 - 1994

Here's an Italian production filmed in Florida, it's all about five teenagers who embark on a boating trip off the coast of Miami and get lost at sea after they're caught in a fierce storm at night. Fortunately, the teens stumble across an abandoned yacht in the middle of the ocean with a mysterious biology lab on board, but, there are also ferocious mutated prehistoric fish running amok. A pretty strange poster for the nineties.

I have a sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our atomic mutant lab, NOW, Rufus The Gnat!.. Here's some... CREATURES FROM THE ABYSS!

Welp, the teens find that yacht and board it. Inside, they cannot find anyone there, but, something there is definitely watching them!

There are tons of bizarre and creepy specimens of sea life in the lab to check out.

One of the guys takes a dead fish and slimes it on a chick's leg for the thrill, or, he's wanting to make a fish sandwich, there's the buns! Your choice of condiments...

You can hear the girls in the sound clip discuss the look of the jarred up little critters.

Something weird is going on in here, better send in the stupid guy to figure it all out.

The yacht is plush, they have booze and music and the girls are scantily clad... Party!!

I like this shot for some reason! Anyway, the girls cook up some fish for dinner for the gang.

Well, the fish makes everyone sick, and, for a damn good reason.. That's some great barf there!

Here are some cool looking fish they find in a freezer, all freaky little prehistoric monsters!

This is an erotic lamp that when you stroke the shaft, well, the bulb gets brighter!!

One guy empties a barrel of fuel onto the floor and lights in on fire, trying to eradicate the terrifying little creatures from the abyss!

One of the guys (the ass hole) gets totally infected and turns into a truly creepy monster dude! He uses the tentacles to whip and beat his victims into submission!

The guy who created the creatures sacrifices himself to the thing, what a way to go!! The ship burns down and only one makes it to safety... We're back tomorrow with more from... The Dungeon!!

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

KING OF JAZZ - Paul Whiteman (1930)

So an anonymous comment suggested we check out this site for a ton of free cartoons featuring Oswald The Rabbit etc, and if you root around, there's a whole Helluva lot more there than that! And since I'm burned out and was looking a for a quick fix, I downloaded a short cartoon titled "The King Of Jazz!" But there was no title card, and I couldn't find anything about it on IMDB, but what I finally figured out is that this short cartoon is just part of a complete movie from 1930 called "King Of Jazz" featuring Paul Whiteman and his Band!

 So, there's a slight introduction, and then we find famed orchestra leader Paul Whiteman on an apparent safari! The animation is some of the early work of Walter (Woody Woodpecker) Lantz!

 Here comes a mean old lion!

 Paul Whiteman takes aim!

 But the lion pulls his skin down, and bounces the shell off of his ribs!

 The lion ricochets a couple more bullets off of his choppers, and now he's ready to be the hunter instead of the prey!

 Paul's in deep doo-doo now!

 The lion goes after Paul like the Macho Man Randy Savage getting ready to pounce on Superfly Jimmy Snuka!!

 The lion sharpens up his teeth, and he's ready for some chow!

 Some cool 1930's swing provided by violin virtuoso Joe Venuti changes the whole climate of the scene!

The lion busts a groove!

Al Jolson's "Mammy" was released just about a month earlier than "King Of Jazz!"

 While the music is jamming, Paul gets conked in the head by a coconut thrown at him by a monkey!

Freshly out of a job, Ted Cruz tries to explain what just happened! 
Check this out! In the Hungarian version of this film, Bela Lugosi had the role of the narrator!

Monday, May 2, 2016

GODZILLA vs BIOLLANTE / Toho Company - 1989

We're back in Japan! Today's story's about a scientist who combines the cells of a rose with those of Godzilla to create a biological creature more horrifying than anything seen before! Of course, they battle it out after Godzilla goes on a destructive tour of Japan.

I have a sound clip for your approval, sooooo, you can push the big red 'GO' button located there by our atomic flower garden, NOW, Ralphie The Tarantula!.. Here's a sample from... GODZILLA vs BIOLLANTE!

This is the reason I changed from a science major to an art major when I was a sophomore in high school, like, what in the Hell are they freakin' talking about?!

Boy, the larger the office space, the more distant you feel...

They even have a high tech Godzilla Monitor to keep tabs on the big guy!

Then, this weird Devil Dude shows up on TV to rap, a bad omen I'm sure!

Anyway, back to the story... Biollante has made its entrance, spawned in a large lake.

Biollante's a freaky looking thing, the center of the rose has teeth, and, check out those runners with alligator fangs!!

Then, the Super X-2 appears, designed to combat Big G and match his awesome fire power. Unfortunately, Godzilla hits the flying weapon with a blast that knocks it out of the air, and, lights out gang!!

Love this shot, it's hard to see, but, some army dude just shot Godzilla in the mouth with a special bazooka shell. So, the big guy completely destroys the building!

Now, Biollante and Godzilla start duking it out. Big G pours it on and explodes the crap out of a ton of blood thirsty runners!

I love these shots of Big B charging at Godzilla, twisted poetry in lumbering motion!

Biollante shoots out sharp toxic runners right through G's hands and body parts...

But, our Big Hero is full of tricks, he almost dies in order to defeat the mighty Biollante! Be back Wednesday when Eegah!! does his thang!!

Monster Music

Monster Music
AAARRGGHHH!!!! Ya'll Come On Back Now, Y'Hear??